The smell of decay hangs heavy in the musty Autumn air. Every pumpkin farmer's worst nightmare has become reality. A hard freeze followed by unseasonably warm weather means only one thing... zombie pumpkins! The compost pile begins to team with rotten carcasses. A disgusting, rancid aroma invites vermin and flies to congregate. This is the dark side of pumpkin patches, kept well hidden from the corn maze and apple cider scene. Can you imagine the public panic if word got out? Sales of pumpkin scented candles would tank. #Pumpkinspice would no longer fill shoppers with warm nostalgia, but now become the new apocalyptic warning hashtag. Forget harvest hay rides and pie eating contests... NO way, NO how! Ok, maybe pie, but only if I had a spotter to keep an eye out for zombiekins. I would also prefer a spotter who ran slower than me. Taking applications now.
No comments:
Post a Comment